A blank statement of "the gasket goes on the wet side" is incorrect.
The gasket always goes on the flange side, NEVER the nut side.
There is no exception to this rule and no gray area either.
It is not uncommon, not desirable but not uncommon, to have the gasket on the dry side if you install the bulkhead in a non traditional way. (backwards - from most applications)
Are you sure you can't simple give it a little more tighten without breaking it down?
Being able to bump the bulkhead allowing it to leak, even slightly, causes me to believe there is.